How not to fall in love with him :-)

Korang kenal this guy?

Sapa-sapa peminat S501 mesti kenal kan. Kim Hyun Joong (KHJ). The team leader of that K-Pop group. Just google about him and his group, nanti you all can know him better.

By  the way, kat channel M Unifi last time ada tunjuk balik cerita dia "Playful Kiss" tu. Mak aihh... I tengok first 2 series je kat situ, and gigih google yang online punya sebab nak tengok balik dari mula sampai habis. Addicted to maximum. Nasib baiklah time tengah tengok tu, cuti semester. Mana tahan tidur pukul 3-4 pagi tetiap hari sebab nak habiskan cepat cerita tu. 

Memang jatuh cinta habis. Tak kisah lah rupa dia masa cerita Playfull Kiss or cerita lagi satu Boys Over Flower tu  macam ala-ala perempuan, tapi his eyes, his smile aduhaiii... bisa mencairkan hati ini. Memang tak tido malam betul. Itu rupa dia 10 years ago lah time cerita tu, cuma google muka dia sekarang, baru betul nampak sado and macho. Cuba tengok MV dia yang ni... 

Unbreakable ni macam the latest of himlah but tu lagu solo dia.. 

Yang Love Ya tu lah 1st video of S501 yang buat I first time jatuh cinta dengan Kpop

Tak delah fanatik minat dia. Cuma since I like his fan Instagram, ada few account pulak tu.. heheheh..so, fans dia ni rajin upload semua pic and his video pasal dia. So, pagi-pagi kalau I bukak IG, penuhlah pic and video KHJ ni. Jadilah sebagai pembuka senyuman dan pembakar semangat nak datang kerja hari tu (Hemmm..tapi tak jadi sangat pun...hahahah)

I think, sebab dia ni jugak kot, I macam suka mati kat KN sebab muka KN is Chinese / Korean / Japanese look. Wahahaha... kemain!!

Leftover food

I memang pemakan leftover food tapi yang kat rumah saja. Sebabnya sayang betul nak membazir makanan, lagilah barang makanan semua mahal sekarang ni. Like ayam, my Dad beli yang organik punya which cost almost RM20 for a whole bird. Pastu, teringat orang susah yang tak dapat makan, or just ate once a day itupun sometimes not a proper meal pun. 

Cerita ni pasal sikap orang yang suka pass leftover food to orang lain sebab tak habis makan, tak sempat makan or that food yang dia simpan tu sebenarnya untuk orang lain. 

Ada dulu, one senior staff kat sini yang I panggil Mak Tiri (NW) to HO sebab HO close gila dengan dia. Semua benda HO will tell her. Everything including gossip. So, NW ni memang ada good relationship with HO sampai belikan extra breakfast for HO. And one fine day, NW maybe plan to buy nasi lemak to all staff kat her office wing and buy 1 extra for HO. Nak dijadikan cerita, HO was on EL that day. So, masa I dok sembang-sembang dengan security guy dekat lobby, she came to me with something and sorok-sorok bagi. I pun peliklah..apa benda tu pulak kan..Then she said "You ambillah..I beli banyak ramai pulak takde". But pelik kenapa nak bagi sorok-sorok depan that security guy? Is it that guy tak dapat ke apa? 

Masa I balik to my office desk, the nasi lemak is wrapped with another recycle paper. Meaning cara NS tadi tak nak orang tahu lah yang it is a pack of nasi lemak. WTH !! Pastu, I terus teringat, few times jugak HO selalu bawak something similar to that packaging when she came back from that wing. Hmmm... kiranya memang NW lah yang bagi and that thing must hide from me. And another incident, bila one more senior staff (ZS), masa dia dapat nasi lemak jugak from NW, ZS asked me.."You dapat tak nasi lemak NW bagi? Dia kata dia beli from XXX ..ala nasi lemak yang sedap banyak bawang tu" Bila I cakap I tak dapat, TS dah jadi serba salah. Siap jawab "Ooo..padanlah dia kata jangan heboh-heboh kat orang". 

Mak aiihh... I tak kisah sebenarnya pasal I tak dapat bila NW bawak apa-apa and tak bagi kat I. Tapi rasa macam pantang sungguh bila dia hanya bagi sebab orang yang sepatutnya dapat takde. For me it is just like a non-love leftover food and I just throw it away.

Recent case, BS pulak. She is my colleague. I know she loves to bake and memang her cake is not so bad, still can makan. During the weekend hari tu, she baked a cupcake and brought to office on Monday. Pastu, the next day (Tuesday), masa kami sibuk-sibuk nak packing balik, dia baru teringat cupcake tu. So, she offered to me suruh I makan bawak balik. I pulak not immediately makan pun sebab masih kenyang makan lunch. Tapi time ambil tu, sebab tak nak tolak rezeki. Sudahnya, benda ni pun sama pengakhirannya... jadi a non-love leftover food and I just throw it away. 

Memang rasa bersalah sebab buang makanan, but for me, kenapa nak bagi benda yang kita tak nak or tak habis pada orang? I rather throw the thing myself dari bagi kat orang. 

Pucca # 26

Sedih betul..sometimes, apa yang kita harap will not easily being granted.  Jadi, I am not saying it a false hope, tapi baiklah kalau kita not thinking about it for the time being.

Banyak benda lain yang lebih important kan, so better we focus dekat benda-benda macam tu.

Uncertain Decision

Wrote on 11/4/2016 (tapi dok terperap dalam Draft folder)

Setelah fikir masak-masak, I think macam tiada faedahnya I mengharapkan sesuatu from KN. I pun kekadang tak faham sangat respond dia. Sometimes okay, sometimes he just gave me his cold shoulder. Sangat menyampah betul. Ntahlah, maybe kan dia memang tak de hati langsung kot kat I... Iyelah..tetiba approach dia kan ... Or dia ada someone else? Kalau dia tak bagi tahu pasal dia dah ada orang lain, macam manalah I nak tahu kan..Or maybe dia takut nak bagi new commitment, after what he had go through with his ex-wife earlier? Ntahlah... 

So, sebab I pun tak nak pening-pening kepala..tak nak buang saat untuk scroll his Whatsapp status, baca his last messages.. so, better delete terus nombor dia. Habis cerita. Whatsapp history pun dah I delete. No conversation left. Tapi, I print screen dulu siap-siap the contact number of him which I save his number, his second number and also his home address before I delete. Takut terlupa sebab memang tak record kat mana-mana...

Haiya...still pathetic of me kan... 

Status today (5/5/16)

Almost a month... 

End of last month, I got a wedding invitation from my current course mate (AS), nun jauh di Melaka. Tetiba I terfikir jugak macam nak ajak KN.. Uishh...beraninya pulak kan..Keluar sekali pun tak pernah. Pastu benda ni I lupa sebab sibuk siapkan my assignment. I asked AI earlier (last 2 weeks kot) yang dia pergi ke tidak to AS wedding and he said yes because he already plan with his family sebab nak buat some family activity jugak  while they reach Melaka later. So, I pun dah macam 20:80 nak pergi tu. 80% tu banyak untuk tak nak pergi. 

Then since semalam, I tefikir the idea again to ajak KN to temankan I pergi. Ntah, tetiba je pulak. Or maybe sebab I just watched drama scene of Duda Terlajak Laris dimana Zack beria-ia nak go outing with Anis and Inas (his janda). He just tried his luck based on his friend's recommendation. Tapi macam tak kot I terfikir my idea tu sebab drama ni...pfffttt...

So, today I beranikan diri ajak KN..ni pun after he respond to my "Hai" whatsapp last night which he only respond this morning. He said okay but he can't promise anything now. Lagipun, weekend memang giliran dia pulak bersama his kids.

Tapi...

Tapi...

Tapi...

Tapi...

I takut if he rejects je sebenarnya.... hopefully not lah...:-(

Ya Allah... please grant this wish for me...Ameenn!!!